Friday, February 23, 2007

Likely Suspects #2 and #3: Annette Funicello and Frankie Avalon

In 1963, Annette Funicello was filmed entirely from the chest up in “Beach Party” to hide her pregnancy with me. All shots of her in a bathing suit were actually a body double.

Annette and Frankie wanted to run away to raise me in peace, but their contracts with the record and movie studios prevented them from doing so. In spite of all this, they planned to sneak away one night under the cover of darkness, but were thwarted by the evil Eric Von Zipper, who received a commission from the adoption agency for stealing me away from them.

4 complaints from ingrates:

Anonymous,  February 25, 2007 at 6:29 PM  

You're killing me with these old sixties videos. You make me feel young again!

Erin February 27, 2007 at 9:18 PM  

I remember thinking her name was Annette FuninJello. I hate Jello, thus she sickened me. She isn't your mom cause Jello is gross

Ungrateful Little Bastard February 28, 2007 at 5:47 AM  

haha that is too funny. She was always a little goody goody for me, but I coveted her figure.

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