Thursday, May 03, 2007

No, you're speaking as a jackass

"I'm all for this disclosure once the birth "parents" have paid back the adopting parents for the 18 years or raising plus expected college expenses. They have no business getting back into the child's life after all the raising has been done. This health history appeal is a red herring. I'm speaking as an adopting parent."

Posted by 'really' May 1, 2007 8:18 p.m

Thanks, Really. I'm really glad when people like you show your true colors. It's really so much better than the smiling happy adoption is a loving choice option, don't you really agree?

But, hey, you've got a right to protect your investment. Damn, we're expensive little bastards. Holy crap if you knew we were gonna cost this much money, you would have gotten that summer house instead. If the former homeowners want to come take a peek at the old lakefront cabin, you can drive them off with a shotgun.

25 complaints from ingrates:

Anonymous,  May 3, 2007 at 8:27 AM  

Oh for the love of...........what the...........vomit.

She forgot to mention the cost of feeding the pony and upkeep on the pool.

Erin May 3, 2007 at 8:45 AM  

okay I'm speaking as an adoptive parent, I'm not sure what YOU are speaking as.

ALL adopted children have the right to know their natural parents. They have a right to health and medical history. They have a right to know that they have moms eyes or dads ears.

What is so hard to understand about basic human rights?

Anonymous,  May 3, 2007 at 9:25 AM  

Obviously he/she views their adopted children as indentured servants.
How can people like this qualify to adopt? Wait, I know, lots of money! High Bid Wins! Or, they used their position as employee of adoption agency to circumvent or alter "home study" results.
It makes me sick.

Anonymous,  May 3, 2007 at 9:35 AM  

Oh crap, Mia -- I just admitted, no pony, but I did buy a cool "Rolling Coaster Children's Ride-On Car." It sure ain't a pony though. And the only pool we have is the inflatable kind. I'm failing miserably.

As far as that asshat, I just don't have any words left, except, well -- asshat.

Heather May 3, 2007 at 10:54 AM  

That comment is sick.

Not only do adopted kids have the basic right to know their first parents, but the commenter is talking about an adopted person who is now an ADULT. Why do they think they should be able to dictate in who is in their grown child's life?

Oh right, because they paid for it.

Anonymous,  May 3, 2007 at 11:36 AM  

Its interesting. I have never seen anyone this territorial over say a dog or cat or even a horse. Adopters, in this case that is what they are are the possessors.

Mommela May 3, 2007 at 12:45 PM  

Oh my word. It's people like this who give adoptive parents a very, very bad name. I'm ashamed of this person. More than anything, I'm worried for any child who endures the tragedy of losing his/her firstfolks, then, to add insult to injury, ends up being stuck with this idiot.

mominmaking May 3, 2007 at 1:59 PM  

I'm gald you posted this. I live in North Carolina, so I think I better get my but in gear and write my representatives. Maybe ya'll can give me some feed back on things to tell them.

abebech May 3, 2007 at 2:31 PM  

This makes me sick and sad, and it sets us all back, doesn't it?

Anonymous,  May 3, 2007 at 4:15 PM  

Unbelievable. Absolutely unbelievable. I am literally too stunned and sickened right now to say anymore.

Unknown May 3, 2007 at 6:41 PM  

this sort of reminds me of the fact that adoption is so rooted in "ownership" of children, rather then wanting to parent a child and put their needs first.

Doughnut May 3, 2007 at 9:16 PM  

I agree Erika...its as though the adoptive parent has "property rights" to the child and if the parents want to know anything, the adoptive parents want to "cash in" on their "chips" opps, meant the adoptee. If I were an adoptee, I'd feel awful and mad, but would/could one be allowed to express that?? Not easily is my guess.

Anonymous,  May 3, 2007 at 9:20 PM  

Those are not people who should have been allowed to adopt a child. People like this make it so hard for other adoptive parents who believe in adoption reform, adoptees' rights and advocate for adoption never to be the first choice, to be believed. I feel so sick after reading this.

Still Born May 3, 2007 at 11:12 PM  

Wow. I think the politically correct term for people like that is 'fuckface'.

It reminds of me something I watched on the Discovery Channel where this woman went to Russia to 'get' a baby and they offered her a picture of the birthmother to give to the child later on in life. The woman's response? "I'm not paying thirty thousand dollars for baby so she can turn around and betray me in 18 years."

Excuse me, ma'am? I think your 30G may have been better invested in, say, a low end Mercedes Benz. It wouldn't be such a burden, would never want to know about the dealership from which it came, and you could shamelessly wreck it with reperecussions only to your worthless self.

And on that note, I'm going to have a drink!

Anonymous,  May 4, 2007 at 12:14 AM  

What the hell??!? People should know that forced love/loyalty never works. That woman should get a dog, or even better, a Mercedes (like Still Born said).

I read the whole article and all the comments. What is all this about "protecting the birthmother's privacy" -- that is bullshit. That is a condition of adoption that we (birthmothers) are FORCED to accept; I've never talked to one who is GLAD to be anonymous. What, do they think we live in fear of our children ever finding us?? Don't they know it's just the opposite? Fuck!

Possum May 4, 2007 at 1:49 AM  

OMG - no truer colours have I ever seen.
Have we not been writing about such things these past few weeks.
Our experiences were NOT just in the past.
This crap is still very alive and well.
Those ungrateful little adoptees just better know who wiped their butts.
(Possum is going to be very ill now........)

Newlyorphaned May 4, 2007 at 7:31 AM  

First I'd like to say Hip, hip, horray that a legislature is tossing the issue around!
There's hope folks! Now for Ms. Suze O! Sounds to me like maybe she partook of the Black Market!

There's a quote out there by Kilbran that goes something like this...I thought you a fool, then you opened your mouth and I knew! Not exact but close enough for the point.

What a sickning excuse for a human being!

Third Mom May 4, 2007 at 3:59 PM  

Holy crap, unbelievable.

I just went over there, and it looks like the original comment is gone, and comments are closed. I hope "really" slunk off in shame.

Michelle May 4, 2007 at 5:36 PM  

As an AP I am ashamed and often wonder why we are given such a bad rap....hmmmm perhaps from a-holes like this?!?! I don't see her comment anymore...dumb @#%$&!!! I don't get it, I really don't get it.

MomEtc. May 4, 2007 at 7:34 PM  

This woman should not be a parent. Her attitude of ownership over her kids is sickening and harmful, to say the least.

Anonymous,  May 4, 2007 at 11:25 PM  

Boo. Really needs to be banned from thinking and speaking.

Why don't you psoe their email addresses when you come across these moronic comments? Please? You're smart, you can find them..

I thought it was funny that they said they were speaking from an adoptive parents perspective. You're kidding. You are an adoptive parent? This wasn't immediately obvious from the first 3 incompetent words written....

Laurie (formerly known as Momseekingpeace) May 5, 2007 at 3:39 PM  

I have to say that I am glad for her comment.
I would rather that this kind of thing be out in the open so that we can talk about it and show that this kind of thinking is still out there, that we still have work to do, alot of work!

This may be an unpopular opinion but in all her awful words, I can see her terror, I think what she is really saying is after all I have invested (I know its awful) I will still be left without a child.

Just my thoughts.

Laurie (formerly known as Momseekingpeace) May 5, 2007 at 3:40 PM  

oh and please dont think I am saying she had the right or that it was ok, I am just trying to see past the obvious ickyness of it.

Mommela May 5, 2007 at 6:59 PM  

Comments are closed, but this little, um, gem is the second from the bottom of the second comments page. There are a couple of rebuttals, too.

Lizard May 9, 2007 at 11:07 PM  

Really's comment should be all that is required as proof that PAPs need to submit to a battery of psych tests before being considered. Holy crap, what a loon.

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