Sunday, November 30, 2008
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Don't you just love The Onion?
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
In the September 2008 edition of the magazine Encontro ( the name means meeting) The article Busca Da Indentadade (means Church of Identity) by Racquel Ayers celebrates passage of a new Project of Law 1756/2003–Bill 1756 introduced in 2003.
read more | digg story
Please give a digg and add Unsealed Initiative as a friend as well. Thx!
Friday, November 21, 2008
Located just a few blocks away from the Convention Center, Antique Row is four blocks of shops and restaurants.
Short on time and shorter on words again tonight, so enjoy this cute video courtesy of WSquareW.com:
This collection of quality adoptive parenting guidebooks, lovingly cataloged by Addie, will help you bring out the best ACS qualities in your adoptling. A library stocked with these titles, followed to the letter, will ensure your adopted child's mark on history, and on another human being.
Please visit, and be sure to order in time for Christmas for yourself and your favorite prospective adoptive parents!
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Friday, November 14, 2008
I know what you’re saying.
Listen, I know, I know. I live on Long Island, where there is a Macy’s on every street corner.
But this Macy’s is different and you want to visit it in July.
Long before it was Macy’s, it was Wanamaker’s. To many in Philly it’s still Wanamaker’s. And it’s nuts because twice a day, something so different, so odd, so beautiful, so incredibly out of the ordinary happens. Something a little like this:
So if you're sitting at home right now, bummed, saying to yourself, 'Goddamn it, why can't I go shopping, hear world class organ music and have a fondue meal all within one block?,' turn that frown upside down, and make your travel reservations for next year's Adoptee Rights Demonstration in Philly.
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Thursday, November 13, 2008
If you need to brace yourself prior to the holiday, c'mon down. It's a friendly group.
Sunday, November 09, 2008
Seriously, listen to that first voice, OK?
Alright, kvetching out of the way - RegDay Report!!
Just as last year, I went into major disassociation mode but at least made some notes throughout the day so I could piece together what went down when I was on auto-pilot.
First up was an adoptee who just wandered by, saw the signs and shouted, "My people!"
She was in reunion, but took two sets of forms and handouts for adoptee friends of hers. Cool.
Second packet was for a store employee, again gathering for an adoptee friend.
Third, a Florida adoptee now living in New York who saw us on the web.
Fourth a fellow AAAFC-er with a search-from-hell situation. She's already registered with Soundex but is going to send an updated information form.
Fifth, two adoptive parents taking home a packet for their adult son.
Last, a volunteer from the AdoptionDatabase group who grabbed a few sets for his adopted siblings.
Definitely not a great turnout, however far better than the zero attendance I was afraid of. I got a few calls during the week and was able to mail out packages to adoptees in New Jersey who heard about it on the radio but couldn't make the drive out.
Borders was fantastic, they offered tons of help during setup and takedown, which they really didn't need to do at all. Most amazing were the moms from Empty Arms who really made the day.
The hopeless reunion romantic in me was holding her breath for a miracle for Joanie....
Believe it or not, we actually had a visit from a man whose wife's birthday was yesterday, and yes she's an adoptee. Sadly though, not the adoptee we were hoping to come across.
Two odd reactions to the event. First an adoptive dad with a grown son who struck up a conversation about it with me. He said he knew the name of his son's first mother, but said he would never tell him. And yet, he took a flyer. Que?
Second a singularly unpleasant woman who could just not stay away from reading the Unsealed Initiative / Support Group stuff, and yet loudly let us know YES AND WE ARE NOT INTERESTED when she was asked, "Do you know anyone who is adopted?"
Hmmmm someone's a little insecure.
So all in all, not a great turnout, but considering it was my first go-around at being a site coordinator, I'm feeling pretty good. Handout-wise I improved on the things I missed last year, and have notes for the things I need to include next year. The biggest improvement needs to be promotion, because at that I suck. I'm more of a wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am type of promoter, where I'll send out announcements to the world but then not follow up if I don't hear back. Either I've got to get better on the follow up, or Long Island needs someone to coordinate next year's table who is excellent at promotion. Because I'm shy as all hell, I'm hoping for the latter.
Please consider doing RegDay in your area next year, honestly no matter how many people show up, the magic is around the table itself. It raises awareness in the people walking by, and it raises hope in yourself. Knowing that I had this Saturday to look forward to has gotten me through some pretty dark days. Here's to the light in all of us, to reach out to someone punched by adoption, and let them know they're not alone.
The winner was chosen from a list of 10 nominees submitted by members of PPL, the adoption community and visitors of Pound Pup Legacy.
The Annual Demons of Adoption Awards was created to to raise a voice against adoption propaganda and the self-congratulatory practices of the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institutes's annual Angels in Adoption AwardsTM
In 2007 the National Council for Adoption had the "Honor" of winning the Demon award for "pushing the adoption agenda in pregnancy consultation".
Saturday, November 08, 2008
I have no gratitude for Joan from NYAdoptees.com who gave me such incredible support and advice when I started organizing the site. I’m ungrateful for the National RegDay Coordinator Petra, who has been keeping this event alive for years.
I’m ungrateful for them all, because behind each volunteer, every RegDay, is someone who knows what it feels like to search. And searching makes me feel very, very ungrateful.
But out of everyone, I’m most ungrateful for my beautiful friend Joanie. I wish she wasn’t coming to volunteer with me today.
Joanie heard about RegDay on the radio last year, and came to the Kingston site to register with Soundex. She was signing up to find her older brother and sister lost to adoption, and she’s been searching for them since. I wish Joanie wasn’t driving 125 miles to volunteer today, because today is her sister’s birthday. I wish she was spending the day with her instead of me.
If you are a female adoptee born in Nassau County, Long Island, New York on November 8, 1963, Happy Birthday. Your younger sister would very much like to get to know you.
Same goes for a male adoptee born in Brooklyn on or about May 5, 1961.
The thought of Joanie sitting at a RegDay table,
makes me very ungrateful indeed.
Friday, November 07, 2008
This was asked to me today in the comments on the “About Me” page I have here. Its a genuine question that I think a lot of people who aren’t effected or maybe even are effected by adoption ask themselves once they come across someone who’s views towards adoption, are similar to mine.
I do not support it. I don’t condone it, nor do I believe in adoption. I have many reasons and I think it will do me some good after this long break to put it into a post and get it into the concrete form of some kind for others to read when wondering why the hell I feel the way I do.
As I have said, i had and still have good parents, adoptive and natural. I wasn’t physically abused, sure my aparents made some mistakes just like all parents do, but nothing to be held by a noose and hung for and not much to blame or hate adoption for.
The little bit being the uneducated state of mind they were encouraged to have and left with after taking me into their care. I don’t support encouraging people experiencing infertility and desperate for a child to adopt. Adoption is not a band-aid for infertility and it never should be. It doesn’t heal someone’s infertility and putting that responsibility onto a child grieving the loss of their mother is dismissive and not honoring the emotional well being of the child.
When a child is born she/he is attached emotionally and physically to the mother. Everything that child wants, loves and needs is provided for from the mother whom he/she has grown with in utero for 9 months until birth.
Everything should be done to keep these beings together, and poverty although one of the leading factors to surrender, should never be a leading factor to surrender because money never makes someone a good parent.
I don’t believe in adoption because it has become an industry that provides babies to couples willing to pay tens of thousands of dollars for a child. With no care of the child’s well being they have price tags put onto their heads that differ according to race and age. Priority has been put on getting the commodity to make billions annually off of the couples willing to pay, instead of helping the children stuck in foster care get homes. Foster youth are rotting away because they have become least valuable and marketable and so they have been swept under the rug.
All the while the rights being given to the adoptees are the least of any and all other parties involved in adoption. We do not have our birth certificates although not one single document promising anyone a right to privacy has yet to be found. Study after study fails to find them (because they don’t exist) and yet millions of us are being discriminated against daily by the denial of our birth certificates.
Our names are changed without our consent all to help fill the dream of the adoptive parents of having and naming their “own” child.
Too many mothers have been coerced and forced to surrender their children via pressure of society from the social stigma of illegitimate born children, forced into unwed mothers’ homes and raped of their motherhood and children. Now even today mothers are still being pressured to surrender in different ways through threats of not being able to pursue their dreams or college or never finding someone who would want to care for a woman and her child born to a diff. man. Marketing in every parenting magazine, in dr’s offices, gyno offices, high schools, counseling centers and yet the real issues, the complexity of adoption is rarely shown. How is it an informed decision if all angles are not being shown?
Not to mention giving surrendering parents rights to veto and keep our records sealed which is unconstitutional by withholding our vital information from us at their beck and call even though their documents did not say anything about privacy rights is discrimination and a slap in the face from the very industry that makes billions annually from us.
There are many ways to care for children, but i do not support in the ownership of them and that is what adoption is to me. It is buying, selling, renaming and falsifying their documents to make the sale legal. It is exploiting and profiting off of the adoptee with no intention of helping them in any way shape or form.
Adoption isn’t doing anything for humanity. It isn’t helping end third world poverty, it isn’t helping children with AIDS, it isn’t reducing the number of children in orphanages, it isn’t reducing the number of children who are being surrendered, it is only helping the adoptive parents get the child they wanted. It is a consumer driven industry that has been built off of the trauma separation and loss of mother and child and father. It is creating unnecessary loss and separation in thousands of families. It is raping people of their ancestry, culture, history and self. It is violating the sense of family too many are advocating for the preservation of in my state of California right now for diff. reasons, but I’m bitter about that too so I’ll throw in my disgust of proposition 8 in as well.
Non profit adoption agencies are making MILLIONS annually and if you don’t believe me, look at their 990 forms online that are public access. I realize that some mothers can’t, for whatever reasons raise their children, but that is not even close to the level of mothers and fathers losing their children each year around our world to be adopted into the families of Americans and European and Australians. (Yes i realize others adopt, but i see these families and countries adopting more than others.)
Adoption should be about the child. Where the child’s rights and feelings are first, are foremost and as the original asker of the question that triggered this post said, should be paramount. But in adoption, of today, it isn’t. The child’s rights and feelings are last. As an adoptee I lost everything and it was never even thought about. I was told to be grateful for it and happy i wasn’t aborted. My loss has been dismissed by society more times than I’d like to remember. The mindset of adoption in this country is unhealthy and frightening, where the leading profit makers in adoption are running the adoption awareness campaigns painting in this beautiful light full of fake love, fake flowers and artificial kindness that is all coming from greed for more money, even if it sacrifices the child’s soul.
It is possible to care for a child without having to rename them, buy them, take away their history, ancestry, records and connection to their family. The “politics” and “industry” of adoption has ruined the very core of why it SHOULD be beautiful. If adoption was for the child, would foster children even be in the system? Or would they already have a home? Would they have to be legally adopted and have their rights stripped and taken from them? Or would they be allowed to be who they are and honored for exactly that and raised with love and respect for being just them. Is it possible to give a child shelter, safety, love, nourishment, care, food and a home without having to exploit them through the industry of adoption? It should be possible and is possible but rarely happens. It definitely doesn’t happen in adoption. Adoption stopped being about the child long ago
Will be back next week. To fill in, here are 97 reasons you want to go to the Adoptee Rights Demonstration in Philly next July. I've posted this one before but it's just so nice, I'll post it twice:
From the kinda-sorta related file and via my email....
People for Better Pennsylvania Historical Records Access
(PaHR-Access)Genealogists * Researchers * Family Historians
We are asking for your help in a grassroots effort to have Pennsylvania make its older state death certificates much more accessible and available online fee-free
There are millions and millions of people who are into genealogy but unless we all speak up we are allowing those who don't care about genealogy decide what records we may or may not have access to. But this will not happen on its own. We need you to personally let the State of Pennsylvania know you support this cause. The more of us that speak up the more likely we are to succeed. Otherwise we could be stuck with the same old existing archaic system indefinitely.
Hope you'll lend a hand and speak up for PA. They've done a great job with this site and have lots of sample letters for ideas. They've even got a sample letter for those who live out of state.
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Take a peek down there on the lower right.
I think it's pretty obvious who the new kid is.
There's only one post up so far, but I think this new blog is going to be around for a while.
Hope you'll subscribe.
Crossposted from Rights of Adoptees:
Adoption Reform Illinois Needs Your Help
WANTED: Letters to Santa Claus
Adoption Reform Illinois wants to raise public awareness that adult adoptees cannot legally obtain an original birth certificate in Illinois.
Those who should write letters are:
relatives, i.e. spouses, children, grandparents, siblings, aunts, uncles, and those who have found an adoptee on their family tree
friends who are aware of the need someone is feeling to have an original birth certificate
Letters should be addressed to:
% Mary Lynn Fuller
109 W. Illinois St., Apt. 506
Urbana, IL 61801
Letters can be signed with just a first name or your full name. Just keep in mind that your letter could be selected to submit to the news media.
Although Christmas is a few weeks away, write now. "Santa" will deliver the letters to Vital Records in Springfield before Christmas.
The more letters, the better!
Example letters but please use your own words:
All I want for Christmas is my original birth certificate. 50 years ago when my adoption was finalized, it was sealed. I have family and friends who were not adopted and they have their OBC.
Mary (last name optional)
All I want for Christmas is for my wife/husband/sister/brother/daughter/son/niece/nephew/granddaughter/grandson to have their original birth certifcate.
Mary (last name optional)
While tracing my family history I've discovered that my great-grandmother was adopted. All I want for Christmas is her original birth certificate so that I can prove lineage to join societies.
Mary (last name optional)
My friend Sandy is adopted and has been denied her original birth certificate. All I want for Christmas is for Sandy to have it.
Mary (last name optional)
From Coleman Mom and Babes:
TIME TO GET BUSY WRITING
All of the key legislators in Indiana have been re-elected. There will be an adoptee access bill introduced. Please start writing legislators letting them know that its time to restore our access to the original birth certificate. By the end of this month the bill will be downloaded onto the site. We will know what is being said and done about the bill.
John Greene of Rhode Island will be meeting with state legislature representatives throughout the month of November.
Please show your support by writing to your elected representative and let them know you'd like to see a clean and simple equal access bill - you're born, you grow up, you get your OBC just like anyone else. John will be bringing with him a printout of support, so please take a few seconds to sign this petition he'll be printing.
It just takes 10 seconds to sign, and ten minutes to send a follow up snail mail note - please give a hand for Rhode Island!
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
I've been waiting all day for someone to get a video of the impromptu Electric Slide in the Philly streets posted. Thanks to YouTuber'er macscotchale for getting these two clips up.
Philly last night:
And in the streets:
#1) Hit play on this and turn the volume up
#2) Hit play on this and turn the volume down (but not too far down!)
#3) Hit Replay again, and again, and again...
My personal feelings on adoption aside, this is just plain evil.
While Arkansas Initiative 1 bans heterosexual unmarried couples from becoming foster caregivers or adoptive parents as well, methinks it was the GAY that caused this to pass.
This sucks, and I offer my sympathy to the 43%.
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
with TwitterVoteReport.com, you can stalk Nationwide...
Peek in on your neighbors...
Or drill down to the land of your birth, in hopes some family member participates!
You can even grab an RSS feed of the action
And with Youtube's Video Your Vote, you can peek in on local voting spots in hopes of catching a familiar face.
So Twitter or YouTube your vote - you never know who's stalking you.
Fair's fair - if you want to stalk me, here's my little contribution to the fun
Monday, November 03, 2008
Read here, s’il vous plaît
Could these be, dare I say, good tidings between adoptionville and the NCFA?
Hard to say.
It's difficult to get worked up over someone who's open to the idea of confidential intermediaries, but then again, once upon a time, so was I.
I'll just say Chuck Johnson has now become a person of ungrateful interest.
Saturday, November 01, 2008
Oh I can't help it. I always think of that song when I see the initials. I'd post the video but it's not keeping with the era, and ULB is nothing if not musically correct.
So here we go, 1967, what's more apt than this?
Please visit and spread the word.