Thursday, February 19, 2009

Say there, moms....

The NCFA is committed to you..........


Mutual Consent: Balancing the Birthparent’s Right to Privacy with the
Adopted Person’s Desire to Know

https://www.adoptioncouncil.org/resources/documents/NCFAAdoptionAdvocateVolumeNo10.pdf


Aren't you so happy they are there to look out for you?

19 complaints from ingrates:

Paragraphein February 19, 2009 at 11:29 AM  

I started a post on this and just stopped because it was nothing but a rant. They make my blood boil. To use US as a means to deny YOU your civil rights, and then to claim to speak for us and care about is... I can't even put words to how EVIL I think this is.

Mia February 19, 2009 at 1:19 PM  

Balance?! How dare they talk of balance!

I would like to balance my foot up their collective asses.

maybe February 19, 2009 at 2:23 PM  

How very kind of them.

Sandy Young February 19, 2009 at 3:02 PM  

After my head quit spinning on my shoulders and the pea soup quit spewing from my mouth, I realized that, as they often do, the NCFA is speaking on behalf of the mothers, but they are equally presumptuous on behalf of the adoptee. These people are equal opportunity pricks!

After calming down a little bit, I feel kind of good about this, though. I can't help but feel that we finally have them in the vulnerable position of RE-acting to some of the things that we have been saying for a very long time. They are not calling the shots for the first time. They are having to re-act to things that Donaldson said, and that we have been saying. Time to keep up the good work, I think!

Suz February 19, 2009 at 4:31 PM  

I have to agree with Nic. This made me rant and curse and want to smash things.

How dare they? Seriously.

Pricks.

Sandy Young February 19, 2009 at 5:06 PM  

Suz, They dare because we let them. We have to let them know that they are no longer allowed to speak for mothers, in any way. They have taken their few, frightened, timid, anonymous 'birthmothers' and trotted them before every legislation and they have never been called on it. We don't need one voice speaking for us to say that this is wrong.

Being Me February 19, 2009 at 10:00 PM  

Oh Mia,
There is some weird imagery there. Not exactly angels dancing on the head of a pin, but a crazy play ground merry go round with them leaning outward and hurling.

I wanted to copy the last page as a reference for a post but it didn't work yet.

It is absurd. Yeah, evil too.

Ungrateful Little Bastard February 19, 2009 at 10:30 PM  

Now, now, now, ladies. Marc Zappala has only your best intentions at heart, to protect you.

I think you should send him a thank you letter.

Sandy Young February 19, 2009 at 11:21 PM  

Okay, that's a good idea, a thank you letter would certainly be in order....and you are spelling THANK, F-U-C-K, right? Okay, it is done....

Ungrateful Little Bastard February 20, 2009 at 7:43 AM  

Or B-L-O-W-M-E, it's a personal choice, really, but Mz Manners says both are appropriate. I'll be working on my own ignored letter over the weekend, but that's the way I spell it.

joanwheeler February 21, 2009 at 2:50 AM  

I'm speechless. I, too, wanted to vomit when reading this newest newsletter from NCFA. I think we should all send them our rants!

I sure do feel sorry for anyone who is lucky enough to be "saved" by this national organization. Natural mothers can curl up in the corner and shake, while adopted children beg for their dinner. And the Queen for Day Crown goes to...the adoptive mother named on her adopted child's records of fake birth. Dad's over there smoking his pipe and reading the sports page as he sits in his pluffy chair.

joanwheeler February 21, 2009 at 11:47 AM  

Sandy, you make a good point. NCFA is re-acting to what we've been saying and what The Donaldson Report published. And yes, Paragraphein, what NCFA is saying in this article IS evil.

I find it interesting that the target group for protection is those few birthmothers who were so traumatized that they can't face the horror of what was done to them. This small segment is held in high esteem, as a tool, a weapon, to prevent all adoptees from achieving access to our true birth certificates.

Steer these traumatized women into therapy to learn coping skills.

They should not be used as weapons against their own offspring! And they should not be the galvanizing force to burying the rights of 6 or 7 million adoptees.

This whole thing is pathetically sick!

cindy psbm February 22, 2009 at 10:36 PM  

I can't believe that they stated that they studied, what was it, 817adopted persons... and thought they were they 'seemed' to have a good sense of identity???
It doesn't make sense.
Isn't there around 3 million adopted persons in US and probably another 2 million in Canada???
Why do they make a conclusion from less than a thousand adopted persons? It should have involved at least 50000 adopted persons to make it a citable and reliable fact.
As a birthmom I have made sure that my sons records are NOT sealed.
The only reason to seal records is because people can't handle the truth, or so they think..

Kippa February 23, 2009 at 11:55 AM  

The phrase "mandatory openness" makes no sense at all when talking about something that is a natural right. It's doublespeak.

I just can't wait to read "Towards Conceptionism: How the Pro-Life Movement Is Key to Revitalizing Western Civ.”, when it eventually gets published.
Maybe we'll even get to see Mr. Zappala on Oprah, discussing that - and perhaps the "Medea Complex" as well.

Lori A February 24, 2009 at 2:12 PM  

I'm willing to send him a thank you letter. I was told that one day I might meet my daughter again and I did. Does anyone know how I can send him a thank you letter?

Ungrateful Little Bastard February 24, 2009 at 2:31 PM  

Here you go:

www.adoptioncouncil.org/about/about_staff.html

Ungrateful Little Bastard February 24, 2009 at 2:50 PM  

OMG Kippa, I thought you were joking with that title.

I just googled it... I so should have known better!

I am without words.....

Sandy Young February 25, 2009 at 3:34 PM  

The study that they are using is (I believe) the Minnesota Study, which used adolescent adoptees in their own homes with their adoptive parents present. They sat at the kitchen table with the adopters right there asking the kids questions about their adoption. Skewed? Ya THINK??? Dubious methodology? MAYBE! Apparently there was an earlier one done, from the same place, where they questioned the kids at their school and the findings were much different.

There is so much wrong with this study, first that it was not in an objective place, second that they used adolescents and predicted that how they were at that moment was how they would be in adulthood, and that the outcome was totally at the adopters' control. The only ones who have EVER given this study any credence is the NCFA and the Federal Govt, at their behest.

The study needs to be exposed for the sham research that it is...

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